I've never quite been able to express the kind of loneliness that sometimes grips me, and I recently stumbled on these words by Anne Sage on her blog "The City Sage." She says:
"I've alway struggled with loneliness. I don't mean a 'call up a few friends to chase the blues away' loneliness. I mean a profound sense of isolation that confines me to my bed; that wracks me with sobs sent from the pit of my gut to consume me from the inside out; that finds me in a crowded room deaf to everything but my echoing thoughts. It's a self-absorbed, self-induced, self-perpetuated sort of loneliness—because the heavier it grows, the harder it gets for me to push it off and do something about it.
"The thing is, I'm tired of trying to do something about it. Tired of showing up at therapy. Tired of risking the whim of fairweather friends. And man alive, am I tired of reading the books. The ones that suggest I never learned to express my emotions or set boundaries in order to feel heard. The ones that claim we are all essentially alone and the sooner we accept that the sooner we'll find peace. The ones that tell me to stay in the now, practice gratitude, feel my feelings. I'm tired of circling endlessly in my own head.
"One book, however, has pushed me out of my head and onto paper—a small distance, granted, but a step forward nonetheless. Writing Down Your Soul teaches an approach to journaling that draws out the frightening, audacious things you've been keeping even from yourself. It forces you to ask difficult questions such as 'What am I hiding?' and 'What do I truly want?' It leaves you staring at a page on which you've just written the words, 'I want someone to love me enough to come find me, no matter how hard I hide.'"
Do you ever feel like this? I know I have many people that I have deep, meaningful relationships with, I know I am not going at this alone, and even still I get gripped with this yucky, heavy feeling sometimes. What do you think?
[Pictures from The City Sage].
Last week I got to go along with live.beautiful to their photo shoot of their new bridal line, which is coming out this summer. I shot their last line, Rough and Tumble, and I was so honoured to be asked to join again! We shot in a stunning park just outside of Hamilton, under a huge tree and in a pretty meadow, and it was pretty magical.All of live.beautiful's jewelry is handmade by Ali and Laura, and their pieces boast of ethical, environmentally friendly materials, resulting in a really earthy, whimsical feel. I have a few pieces from them, namely their herkimer diamond Audrey Studs, and I wear them every. single. day.
live.beautiful has a really great service they're offering to brides (and beyond) for their bridal line, where a bride can bring in an heirloom or antique piece of jewelry, and they will revamp it and make it in to a one-of-a-kind custom piece. I think that's such a cool idea for wedding jewelry as your something old, something new, to revamp a sentimental piece and make it all your own.
Stay tuned for the pictures from the shoot (these are obviously my dinky phone pictures), and for the launch of live.beautiful's lovely bridal line, due in a few weeks!
Jewelry by Ali Kekewich and Laura Hart from live.beautiful Set Styling by Lynzie Kent from Love By Lynzie Photography (not shown) by Beth Kaye and Ty Bertrand from Beth & Ty In Love Wedding dress from Pearl Bridal House, by Hayley Paige Modeling by (the stunning!) Jacklyn Barber Macarons by Nadia And Co.
“Your soul knows the geography of your destiny. Your soul alone has the map of your future, therefore you can trust this indirect, oblique side of yourself. If you do, it will take you where you need to go, but more important it will teach you a kindness of rhythm in your journey.”John O’Donohue, Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom